Saturday, 10 August 2013

My Thoughts On: Leaving College and "Growing Up"

I know that this isn't a book related discussion, but it’s one that has plagued my mind lately. Ever since finishing college people have been asking me life related questions. Telling me it’s time to grow up and making me genuinely scared about where I'm going. I'm only 18, is it really time for me to grow up? Should I have to give up my “wild” youth because I've left college?

Unlike so many of my peers I'm not going to university. What does this mean for me you may ask, well, to be quite honest I don’t really know! I took photography at college, it’s not exactly academic but I'm certain that I want to become a photographer. College was a complete waste of time though, yes I got the qualification but they can’t teach you your own style. So I'm adamant that I'm not going to study it at uni. But now I need to find something to fill in the gaps when I'm not shooting images. This is proving to be a hard task! 

I've had jobs and technically I do have one, I work for my dad but that’s not what I want to do. I would like a job that interests me but that’s a lot to ask for when there are so little jobs going at the minute. I know I shouldn't be picky but I don’t want to be stuck in a 9-5 job that I hate. 

So, where does growing up come into this? Well everyone is telling me to grow up lately. We may get older and more “mature” but I don’t think I should have to change in order to grow up. Old habits never die right? I guess I have to look at things differently now I'm on the journey of self-discovery. But like I said I'm only young, so should I have to abandon my youthfulness and get serious all of a sudden in order to figure myself out? I don’t think so.

And that leads me to question whether we ever grow up. My parents and grandparents say they feel no different to what they did when they were my age. Yes they've got their act together, got a job and started a family. But heck, they’re all so silly and immature still! I understand that physically they’re ageing but they seem no different to yesterday or 10 years ago. 

I'm envious towards those people who know what they want to do in life as I have no clue. Everyday seems like an adventure and although it may be hard at times I'm sure I’ll get to the point when I know what I want. But right now I'm content with what I'm doing which isn't a lot other than reading! So what I'm really trying to say is that I’d like to figure it out in my own time rather than feeling pressured by family and friends all of the time.

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